My approach is simple and very practical:

1) Loving AND effective is always the goal.  Our children need us to be loving.  Our children also need us to be effective.  We must be both.  One without the other will always cause problems.  Loving and effective is the balance that makes parenting fun and profoundly satisfying.  learn more

2) Focus on the essentials.  Work on the essentials.  Try to master the essentials. When we get the essential pieces right - everything else falls into place.  Establishing the essentials saves us countless hours of misguided effort and frustration. Our “three-legged stool” helps us understand, organize and implement the essentials. learn more 

3) Knowledge is not enough - we need to understand that knowledge.  Understanding is not enough - we need to turn that understanding into effective action.  Without effective action, it doesn't matter how much we know.  Our parenting will never be complete or successful. learn more

4) “Making” children behave is not our job!   That’s their job.  Our children are responsible for their own choices, attitudes, and behavior. If we want our children to take responsibility for themselves and make themselves behave, we must understand how this works. learn more