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Welcome to The Loving And Effective Parent
My name is James Shaver. I don’t know what parenting challenges you are facing or how you feel about them, but I do know this: if you are looking for friendly, encouraging, and effective parenting help - I’m your guy.
I have been helping parents successfully overcome parenting challenges since 2012. But don't just take my word for it. Testimonials
*Why chose me for parent coaching (below).
There is nothing more convenient or effective than parent coaching. Get started today by scheduling a free 20 minute introductory phone call.
Scheduling for 2025 spring classes will begin soon. Located in Raleigh, NC near the Cary town line, these classes will be in-person with limited class size.
Started my YouTube Channel in December 2024. The content is based on the best of what I have learned working with parents since 2012. Check it out!
My approach is simple and very practical:
1) Loving AND effective is always the goal. One without the other will always cause problems. When we are both loving and effective with our children, it just feels right. There is this profound sense of satisfaction and purpose even when things are difficult. learn more
2) Focus on the essentials. When we get the essential pieces right - everything else falls into place. Establishing the essentials first saves us countless hours of misguided effort and frustration. Our “three-legged stool” helps us understand, organize and implement the essentials. learn more
3) Knowledge is not enough - we need to understand what that knowledge means. Understanding is not enough - we need to turn that understanding into effective action. Without effective action, it doesn't matter how much we know. Our parenting will never be complete or successful. learn more
4) “Making” children behave is not our job! That’s their job. Our children are responsible for their own choices, attitudes, and behavior. If we want our children to take responsibility for themselves and make themselves behave, we must understand how this works. learn more
*Why Choose Me
I will help you find your best parenting. There is no one right way to parent - but there are many wrong ways! I will match your personality, temperament, and parenting goals with proven parenting approaches and strategies. We will find what works best for you and your children.
I model what I teach and coach. I want you to experience loving and effective. I want you to experience a safe, empathetic, and encouraging environment and relationship - where you know I want you to succeed. That is what our children need from us.
As a coach, I will push you (gently) from knowledge to understanding to effective action. (That only works if you do your part.) Getting all the way from knowledge to understanding to effective action is one of the greatest advantages of one-on-one coaching.
Affordable and fair pricing. I have made a commitment to be available and accessible. Many parent coaches charge over $100/hr with some online coaches charging over $200/hr. I charge $85/hr.
My parenting book!
Don’t get too excited. It won’t be published until 2026. I know there are about a gazillion parenting books already out there, but I have my reasons. I want to write a parenting book that parents should read first. It would cover the essential elements of parenting in a way that is easy to understand and remember.
Working with parents has shown me way too many of us don’t have a comprehensive, big-picture view of parenting. We are missing pieces. We are also missing how elegantly all the pieces work together. I would like to change that.
Potential title: Loving And Effective Parenting: The Essentials
